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Cristina Fernandez secluded to prepare her last 'State of the Nation' speech

Wednesday, February 25th 2015 - 05:37 UTC
Full article 29 comments

Argentine president Cristina Fernandez flew on Tuesday evening to Rio Gallegos, where according to the presidential agenda she will visit the mausoleum built by her to the memory of her late husband and former president Nestor Kirchner. Read full article

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  • chronic

    Cretina's oration - oh my. It will be monumentally stupendous in its comedic failure if previous addresses are any indication. Can't wait!

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 05:47 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • zathras

    According to reliable media sources, Cristina Fernandez's address will be longer than in previous occasions....

    You almost feel sorry for those having to listen to that.

    I make a predication, she will not mention the Falkland Islands once.

    Although she will probably mention some mythical made-up name multiple times.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 08:44 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • ElaineB

    Do we think she will lay the ground for another Kirchner……. Fat Max?

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 09:07 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Trunce

    I do hope so. I'd hate having to go back to the Telegraph's Matt cartoon for by first laugh of the day.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 09:21 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • falklandlad

    Hopefully this will be the last and that the disaggregation of the Kirchner dynasty will soon follow.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 09:49 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Iron Man

    Looking at that photo, it's clear Cretina has handled a shaft or two in her time. The bloke behind her seems delighted!

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 10:18 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • SebaSvtz

    Look at that picture ...
    There should be a “Wanted” legend under it.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 10:59 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Usurping Pirate

    I love Bubblear's pisstake of her speeches :

    http://www.bubblear.com/the-cadena-nacional-season-06-episode-19/

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 11:00 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • SebaSvtz

    @ 8 they are very good indeed.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 11:16 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Briton

    Its my stick
    no, its mine,
    no it isn't give it back,
    sod of its mine all mine,

    smile the newspapers are here,
    now give me the bloody stick etc

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 11:48 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • screenname

    her speech was going to be...

    will the last person out turn off the lights?

    but the lights won't be running by then anyway so she's had to scrub that one

    chuckle chuckle

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 01:12 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • ElaineB

    @8 Agreed.

    I just can't see Fat Max's army disappearing after the end of CFK's reign. What will they do with all those brainwashed devotees?

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 04:31 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • ChrisR

    @ 12 ElaineB
    “ What will they do with all those brainwashed devotees?”

    Executing them all would be a good start for Argentina.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 04:40 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • imoyaro

    She's already set up the next train wreck, with a view of forcing the next patsy to resign from office. Maybe then she can be brought back in legally by “popular” acclaim, or failing that, Maximo Gordo for the Adventures of Nestornauta Part III. ;)

    http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b521/imoyaro/chopperlaff_zpsryuikyku.gif

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 05:31 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Conqueror

    @6. Of course he's delighted. He's dead!
    @7. Print it. Use it for target practice!

    How fortunate we British and Falkland Islanders are. Don't have to listen. Wouldn't understand her if we did. And then who would believe her?

    Here's an interesting article.
    http://www.inquisitr.com/1772295/is-cristina-kirchner-running-the-argentine-presidency-like-the-mafia/

    Searching to get an idea of how long she might rabbit on for, I found this
    http://www.inquisitr.com/1772295/is-cristina-kirchner-running-the-argentine-presidency-like-the-mafia/
    Do make sure that you follow through and get to the comments. Quite enlightening.
    And it seems that CFK spoke to the argie Congress for no less than 3 hours. Clearly likes the sound of her own voice. Shouldn't expect the State of the Nation gibberish to be any less. Just imagine turning on the tv on at 7pm and she's still rabbiting at 10pm. Are there commercial breaks?
    @13. Do we want anything that's good for argieland? Just imagine if argieland were properly governed. Remember how Hitler turned around the economy of Germany? He went on to a war economy. The autobahns? For rapid troop movements. The railways? For rapid movement of heavy equipment. The aircraft, tank, weapons, ammunition factories. Imagine argieland able to produce all its war-fighting equipment. Mightn't the first move be to invade Urineguay and destroy those nasty pulp mills? Careful what you wish for!

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 05:57 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Captain Poppy

    Meanwhile, back at la Casa Rosada, Tinman jerks off Kissitoff as Asslips practices her speech while sitting on the doorknob seeking feedback:

    “ I have a Dream”

    psst.....”it's been done”

    “oh”

    “3 score and 15 years ago”

    “psst...same”

    “mmmmm”

    “in order to form a more perfect nation”

    “move on”

    “its been done too?”

    “yup”

    “Soldiers of the old guard: I bid you farewell”

    “Napoleon”

    “damn”

    “Ok what then?”

    “try Bill Clinton's......I have sinned”

    The speech writing is no9t going so well today.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 06:09 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • The Voice

    Elaine
    Motivational address by Gollum ( We wants it we must have it!) An RG Army made up of Paulys, Nostrils, Dunny Burgers with Think and Fat Max presiding over the cookhouse!!! Axel Arg as the voice of Argentina broadcasting frightening messages to the enemy. Navy equipped with kayaks, airforce in hang gliders. “Intelligence” courtesy of Voice (we are aware of his poor computer and navigation skills :-( )

    La Camping it up is a force to be frightened of... LOL!

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 06:28 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • willi1

    may be she will also be found in her bathroom...on the floor...

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 06:44 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • ElaineB

    Ahhhh, we may laugh at La Campora - who wouldn't outside of Argentina - but they are specifically groomed to worship CFK, stoked up and led by Fat Max. If nothing else it has given them focus in otherwise hopeless lives. I don't think they are going to admit they have been worshipping a false God.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 07:23 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Frank

    @8 why do they need to use deaf and dumb language when there are subtitles...are her devotees that dumb they can't read?

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 07:35 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Pete Bog

    @3 Elaine

    “Do we think she will lay the ground for another Kirchner……. Fat Max?”

    Please-though I doubt Argentines would agree with me.

    Good news for the Argentine catering industry though.

    “According to reliable media sources, Cristina Fernandez's address will be longer than in previous occasions since she is expected to give a long detailed report on the achievements of her, and her husband's, administrations”

    CFK:We promised you the Malvinas, but instead we have put distance between ever invading them again, but hey I'm still president and with our policy of doing exactly the opposite of what we could do to get a piece of the action, I promise they will be ours before I leave Casa Rosada, trust me, I'm Argentinian.

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 08:42 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • golfcronie

    @21
    Have the crew of the Eirek Raude arrived in Stanley yet as the semi submersible has arrived or close now. Will they be drilling at the start of march?

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 10:46 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Britworker

    Can someone explain the significance of the toilet brush they are holding?

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 11:44 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Troy Tempest

    16 CP

    Brilliant !!

    Feb 25th, 2015 - 11:46 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Heisenbergcontext

    Nestor Kirchner was one creepy looking dude. The above photograph is highly illustrative.

    Feb 26th, 2015 - 01:01 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Captain Poppy

    Nasty Nestor and his old bugged eyes. Maybe God blessed his with Graves because it was known how bad a person he will be. I really hope his heart attack was slow, long, hard and painful for as long as possible when he died. Most of all I hope KFC was there watching.

    Feb 26th, 2015 - 01:16 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Conqueror

    @19. Surely there must be plenty of rope?
    @23. CFK likes it twirled up her gaping arse.
    @25. Even more creepy now. Because he's dead. However, in accordance with his last wishes, CFK has to visit his mausoleum regularly to give him repeated blow-jobs. It's understood that she believes that, if she does it right, she can re-inflate him. Is it getting a bit manky now?

    Just as a special thought, is it possible that she's already dead and decomposing?

    Feb 26th, 2015 - 04:45 pm - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Heisenbergcontext

    @27

    I think you might of over-egged the souffle there Conqueror.

    Feb 27th, 2015 - 01:33 am - Link - Report abuse 0
  • Simon68

    26 Captain Poppy (#)
    Feb 26th, 2015 - 01:16 pm

    I seriously believe that if Nestor was exhumed and subjected to an autopsy, we would find that he also received a bullet in the head. CFK wanted to be the eternal ruler of Argentina, not a second to Nestor!!!!!

    Feb 27th, 2015 - 02:16 pm - Link - Report abuse 0

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